Eagles vs. Cowboys Recap

Boyz II Men, Lightning Crashes, and The Spit Heard Around the World

The energy in Philadelphia was palpable yesterday. A kiss of crisp autumn air slowly unraveled into heavy summer heat. At least 20 people greeted me with an obligatory “Go Birds” on my way to grab coffee. One guy in a Dawkins jersey was drinking a white claw at 11 am. Football is so back baby, and you could feel it.

The city was buzzing, waiting to cheer on the reigning Super Bowl Champions against Dallas, a team most of us were taught to hate before we could even walk. Little did we know the anticipation would unfold into what I think is one of the most chaotic football games I’ve ever seen.

If you had a spitting controversy, a lightning delay, and Boyz II Men on your NFL opening weekend bingo card, then you 100% saw all of this coming and should go into fortune-telling.

SPITGATE

The spit heard around the world! The magic loogie! Jalen’s drool! The start of this game was drenched in weirdness. After an opening kickoff that saw Eagles fullback Ben Vansumeren injure his knee and get ruled out for the game, the Cowboys’ offense and Eagles’ defense took the field.

From the viewer's perspective, Dak Prescott left the Dallas huddle to confront an antagonizing Jalen Carter (All-Pro defensive lineman, certified crazy person) who was nearby. Carter did what any irrational person would do and SPIT on Dak Prescott.

Now listen, I don’t condone spitting on anyone. It’s like the top 5 on the most disrespectful things you can do to someone (I’ll make a list later). I can see Carter receiving a major fine from the league and a minor suspension from the team. Jalen is a player whose immense talent is occasionally eclipsed by his hotheadedness. He’s a mean guy, which makes him great at his job, but at times a liability.

But listen baby, this is cinema. NBC is in the entertainment business, and they know what they’re doing. The broadcast waited until the 4th quarter to reveal that Dak Prescott SPIT FIRST!

One spit is an issue; two spits are officially a “-gate”! Our spit-by-spit analysis at Burds of a Feather shows that even though Prescott was slinging saliva towards the Eagles’ defense, it looked like just a normal, non-antagonistic hawk. Carter saw that and responded accordingly because he is, as I mentioned, a little crazy. I mean, what more could you want from an opening game (except for probably less spit). I can’t wait to tell my grandkids about this one day.

GAME RECAP

Suddenly, without Jalen Carter, the Eagles' defense was left with a gaping hole in the center of their line to be filled by Jordan Davis and Moro Ojomo, both of whom historically have not played a ton of snaps per game.

The Cowboys took advantage and came out swinging with a balanced attack, marching down the field and scoring on their first drive with a 2-yard run by Javonte Williams. The Cowboys offense looks severely underrated, with a nasty offensive line (see: Tyler Guyton literally punching Jalyx Hunt), a strong running game, and the receiving weapons to make noise this year (CeeDee Lamb is still All-World).

For all of the Cowboys' offensive juice, the Birds matched it with their “death by a thousand cuts” offense. Jalen Hurts looked confident and decisive in the pocket (he ended the game 19/23 for 152 yards with 62 yards rushing). He made quick reads, got the ball out of his hand, and showcased his running ability by scoring a pair of TDs in the first half.

Saquon Barkley is still Superman (see this insane one-handed catch and run in the 4th quarter). He gashed the Dallas defense early. Even his 4-yard runs looked like Hall-of-Fame highlights. The Eagles' offensive line bullied a smaller Cowboys defensive line, protecting Hurts and opening up running lanes for Saquon. Patullo opened up his tenure as Eagles offensive coordinator with a strong script that resulted in a Hurts rushing TD.

From there, it was a track meet. Both offenses went up and down the field at will. Neither team could generate a pass rush (if only the Cowboys had an All-Pro pass rusher).

The Eagles' defense had a sloppy start with a series of costly penalties, struggling to cover Dallas’ wideouts. Adoree Jackson specifically is fried chicken. He’s cooked. He was a welcome mat for any Cowboys receiver lined up against him. At one point, Jackson got benched briefly for Jakorian Bennett. The second cornerback spot is officially an issue. CeeDee Lamb had a big night with 7 catches for 110 yards (outside of several drops) against a “still figuring it out” Eagles secondary.

Going into the half, the Eagles were up by 1 with a score of 21-20 after a pair of Hurts rushing touchdowns and a Barkley rushing touchdown.

Both offenses slowed down after halftime. The Eagles created some wiggle room with a Jake Elliot 58-yard field goal (JAKE THE MAKE), but struggled to do much from there. The Cowboys had opportunity after opportunity to score, but couldn’t take advantage. In one instance, former Eagle frustration Miles Sanders broke free for a 49-yard run with a touchdown-saving tackle from Zack Baun. On the next play, Sanders fumbled the ball after being stripped by Jihaad Campbell, with a recovery by Quinyon Mitchell. The defense was starting to come alive.

Apparently, Mother Nature is a Cowboys fan (cue “no one likes us, we don’t care). Lightning in the area resulted in an hour-long weather delay.

Afterwards, both teams came out cold. The Eagles' run game was bottled up, and the Cowboys kept missing opportunities. With the Eagles up by 3, the Cowboys had the ball twice in the final 5 minutes. On both drives, the Birds' defense held up in four-down territory, assisted by multiple Cowboys drops.

The Birds iced the game with a Jalen Hurts run for a first down with 1:40 left. A weird, difficult rivalry game that saw sloppiness on both sides of the ball. It’s great to see resilience from this young but experienced Eagles team, but there are a lot of things to clean up.

TRENDING UP

• Eagles Linebackers! If you told me a few years ago that the Eagles would have the most promising linebacker unit in the league, I would politely ask you to lay off the drugs. Both Zack Baun and rookie Jihaad Campbell made mind-blowing athletic plays this game. Baun continued his dominance from last year with jaw-dropping reliability, including the chase down of Miles Sanders on his 49-yard run and excellent defense on a seam route against Jake Ferguson. Campbell had his own pass defensed on a seam route against backup tight end Brevyn Spann-Ford and was constantly around the ball, including his forced fumble against Sanders. This unit will patch up a lot of holes for a defense still trying to figure things out.

• Backup Running Backs! A position no one literally ever thinks about, especially when your starting RB is a generational talent. Before the injury, Will Shipley looked decisive and athletic with 3 runs for 26 yards. AJ Dillon got in on the action with some solid runs as well. If both can become reliable contributors, that can go a long way in spelling Barkley who had 436 total carries last year.

• Eagles Rookies! This game saw solid contributions from the Eagles' first two picks, Jihaad Campbell and Andrew Mukuba (AKA Mukuba Gooding Jr.). We touched on Campbell, but it’s only a matter of time before Mukuba takes over as full-time safety. He had 3 solo tackles, some of those in big spots.

• Kevin Patullo! Kevy with the Clipboard opened the game with a great script that resulted in a Hurts TD. He gave Hurts easy reads and relied on the run game and Dallas Goedert early. Though he could’ve done a better job adjusting in the second half, he still generated the right calls at the right times when the game mattered most. I’m excited to see him grow as a play caller. The next step is finding a way to get your stars involved early (A.J. Brown forced me to write this).

TRENDING DOWN

• Adoree Jackson! Cooked candidate of the week. Jackson was on skates all game. He never looked comfortable, and Dallas took advantage of it. He gave up 103 yards on 7 targets and, for a spell, got benched for Jakorian Bennett, who looked better by comparison. If the Eagles want to repeat, they’ll have to solidify that second cornerback position.

• AJ Brown’s Patience! The Eagles are testing A.J.’s inner excellence. The offense for this game was focused on ball control and not making mistakes, which, honestly, is a lot of what we saw in the regular season last year. What did that mean for AJ Brown? Zero catches for zero yards until the last minutes of the game where he caught 1 pass for 8 yards. I’d love to see Patullo draw up some easy looks for Brown in the future to get him involved early. At least before A.J. throws a book at him.

• The Eagles' Discipline! I know Week 1 is pretty much preseason Week 5, but 93 first-half penalty yards is nuts.

• Landon Dickerson’s Health! The big man, who was already dealing with a knee injury in camp, left the game late last night with a back injury. Dickerson keeps that offensive line afloat. If the injuries start piling up, it might be a good idea to let him sit and get healthy.

• The Refs! Booo refs! From the taunting call on Nolan Smith to the targeting call on Reed Blankenship, the referees were questionable last night. They looked rusty and made some rash decisions. Maybe they need a training camp too.

• Jalen Carter: The aforementioned spit heard around the world.

HOT TAKES

• Boyz II Men should sing every National Anthem for every NFL game moving forward. Please forward this to Roger Goodell or Jay-Z or whoever does that.

• Kevin Patullo had a great game, but I’d love to see him open up the offense. I think it’ll naturally happen over time.

• The Cowboys, specifically Dak Prescott, are criminally underrated. I think their defense with the loss of Micah Parsons can at least be league average. But their offense can once again be a Top 5 unit if everyone stays healthy.

THINGS ONLY I CARE ABOUT

The Eagles banner ceremony was weird, but I was kind of into it. The Linc transformed into a cult-like temple drenched in green lighting. It looked like Jeffrey Lurie was sacrificing the smaller Lombardi Trophy at the altar of two bigger Lombardi Trophies.

Was this ceremony organized by the cult from Wild, Wild Country? If so, what a successful transition into event planning for them! Rob McElhenny introduced the team in what felt like a fever dream. Everyone was drunk. Let’s do it again!